Double Down Dare – October 2023

October’s Dare will challenge you to double down on foreplay! Get ready for more pleasure and better communication!

Often wives don’t allow themselves the time necessary to become fully aroused before engaging in sexual intercourse. Friend, you are completely worthy of the time it takes for you to get turned on! You deserve to feel an actual yearning in your body for sexual release.

Do you ever rush yourself through sex with thoughts like:

·       “This is taking too long.”

·       “I am taking too long.”

·       “He’s probably getting bored or impatient because I’m taking so long to get excited.”

·       “I bet his hand or tongue is about to break off. We need to move on.”

·       “I should be more turned on by now, what’s wrong with me?”

·       “What he’s doing feels good, but I wish he would do __________ instead. And I don’t want to say that out loud.”

·       “Let’s just move on so he can orgasm, and we can be done. It doesn’t matter if I orgasm.”

·       “I’m doing this for him anyway so it’s fine if only one of us has a good time.”

·       “I’m getting close to an orgasm but I’m having trouble getting there, and I am frustrated with my body, and I just want this over so I don’t feel frustrated with myself anymore.”

·       “I wish we could stop and go back to caressing or even talking because I’m distracted and not turned on yet, but he’s really excited, and we’re already at genital contact so I have to keep going.”

·       “Maybe next time will work better for me….”

This month, try an experiment where you “double down” on the time you allow yourself to get aroused. Notice when one of the above thoughts pops into your head. Next, instead of rushing yourself, estimate how long you’ve been getting busy with your husband, and then double down on time allowed for your arousal. We created a “Double Down Dare Playlist” on the CWIVES Spotify channel for encouraging, sexy background music!

For example, let’s say you two are 15 minutes into foreplay, you’re not truly aroused, and then a “you’re taking too long, move on” thought pops up. That’s your cue to say “double down,” and then give yourself permission to ask for and receive 15 more minutes of whatever you need to become more aroused.

In advance, you can ask your husband to partner with you in the Double Down Dare so he knows that you’re going to say “double down” when you aren’t fully aroused yet and need more time. You might also need to go back to talking or caressing to allow arousal to build. You could receive a massage with this organic lavender massage oil from Aloe Cadabra or since it’s October, check out Aloe Cadabra’s pumpkin spice flavored lubricant!

And it is completely fine to say “double down” multiple times in a sexual encounter.

You are completely worthy of the time it takes for you to get turned on!